You can read the Good Wives Guide below with some amusement.

I’ve read that this was advice given to newlywed women in the 1950’s.

Hopefully, it’s a fun way to get to a very important subject.

The husband-wife role expectations is a key area for couples to discuss during marriage preparation, and there are sections in my main marriage preparation course that cover it.

Ok, here’s the 50’s guide…

The Good Wives Guide

• Have dinner ready. Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal ready on time for his return. This is a way of letting him know that you have been thinking about him and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry when they come home and the prospect of a good meal (especially his favorite dish) is part of the warm welcome needed.

• Prepare yourself. Take 15 minutes to rest so you’ll be refreshed when he arrives. Touch up your make-up, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh looking. He has just been with a lot of work-weary people. His boring day may need a lift and one of your duties is to provide it.

• Clear away clutter. Take one last trip through the main part of the house just before your husband arrives. Gather up schoolbooks, toys, papers, etc. and then run a dust cloth over the tables.

• Over the winter months of the year you should prepare and light a fire for him to unwind by. Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order, and it will give you a lift too. After all, catering for his comfort will provide you with immense personal satisfaction.

• Prepare the children. Take a few minutes to wash the children’s hands and faces, comb their hair, and if necessary change their clothes. They are little treasures and he would like to see them playing the part.

• Minimize all noise. At the time of his arrival, eliminate all noise of the washer, dryer or vacuum. Try to encourage the children to be quiet.

• Be happy to see him. Greet him with a warm smile and show sincerity in your desire to please him.

• Listen to him. You may have a dozen important things to tell him, but the moment of his arrival is not the right time. Let him talk first - remember, his topics of conversation are more important than yours. Make the evening his.

• Never complain if he comes home late or goes out to dinner, or other places of entertainment without you. Instead, try to understand his world of strain and pressure, and his real need to be at home and relax.Your goal. Try to make sure that your home is a place of peace and tranquility where your husband can renew himself in body and spirit.

• Don’t greet him with complaints and problems. Don’t complain if he’s late home for dinner or even if he stays out all night. Count this as minor compared to what he might have gone through that day.

• Make him comfortable. Have him lean back in a comfortable chair or have him lie down in the bedroom. Have a cool or a warm drink ready for him. Arrange his pillow and offer to take off his shoes. Speak in a low, soothing and pleasant voice.

• Don’t ask him questions about his actions or question his judgment or integrity. Remember, he is master of the house and as such, will always exercise his will with fairness and truthfulness. You have no right to question him. A good wife knows her place.

Husband and wife roles are not what they used to be!

Nothing is written in concrete. What works for one couple might not fit another’s couple’s situation. And time and circumstances can change in a marriage that require shifting roles.

Spend some time talking about your marital role expectations:

• What are my expectations of you / your’s of me as husband or wife?

• How does our family of origin (family you grew up in) affect our expectations?

• How flexible do I think can be with roles if circumstances change?

• What’s your vision of our evenings together?

• Is there something you are unhappy about now?

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This entry was posted on Monday, October 1st, 2007 at 3:43 pm and is filed under Husband-Wife Roles, Expectations, Marriage News. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.